A review of United Airlines on my flight from SEA to NRT
Friday, March 19th, 2010
A 10 hour flight supplemented by unlimited free gin, coke, Kirin beer, a Fate/Stay Night marathon with no subs, and crying babies. Awesome.
The flight experience was better than I expected. I purposefully kept myself awake so I would have an easier time adjusting for the jet lag. While awake I took note of my surroundings for a constant 10 hours.
Sitting back in the economy class with cramped leg space, and an arm rests 4 inches wide that I had to share with two other grown men. One a heavy snoring Japanese man heading to Singapore, the other a tall and lanky Singaporean staying in Japan. Like all asians in a public space, they did not talk at all.
The lavatories are smaller than they are on a domestic plane. Since I was drinking heavily throughout the duration of the flight, I made it a point to visit every one on the plane (though I was denied access to the premium cabin lavatories). While unloading what my liver would call a ‘double-shift’ I would often wonder why anyone would use these things for sexual encounters. They smell like poop, have no room to spread your legs, and have piss all over the floor and seat. Mile high club? I’d still do it for some reason unknown to my logic circuits.
Upon arrival, exiting the plane was faster than expected, save for the semi-old lady who couldn’t seems to make her shitty roller luggage orient the correct way. Maybe she forgot there was a line of 60 anxious passengers behind her, with me in front. Sometimes you just get the urge to push people. Upon exiting, passengers are standardly waved off by all the stewardesses, wow that is a word. I finally got a closer look and noticed most of them were 40-60 of age, Japanese, and quite good looking for the color of their hair and the amount of make up they wore. But as I got to customs and saw a couple lines of Japanese stewardesses from other companies, the standard was raised 2 fold.
Anyways, flight experience, 4 out of 5 stars, purely for the free alcoholic beverages.
PS. when the fuck are they going to pu 110v plugs on planes? I wanan fucking use my godamn laptop on a 10 hour flight. fuck.




















